Yes, I’m a white Muslim convert. What gave me away?

By Hajira Amla

I am a white Muslim. In South Africa, this is not a common sight, so eyes bore into me wherever I go. Non-Muslims stare at me, Muslims stare at me. Hell, even animals stare at me. I’ve learned to ignore it over the years, but whenever I go out with friends, many of them can’t get over the daggers thrown at me from all directions. Many white / non-Muslim people resent me because they assume that I threw Christianity aside for the sake of a man. Muslims are suspicious of me because they assume the same thing.

For the record: I didn’t convert to Islam for any of the following reasons:

·         Because I was having an affair with a Muslim guy and I had to convert in order to get married

·         Because I was trying to impress anybody

·         Because I’m going through “a phase”

·         Because I hold “extremist views”

·         Because I don’t know enough about Our Lord Jesus

I like being a Muslim. I wear a scarf but I’m not oppressed. I’m not a terrorist. I’m not even slightly bothered by what others think. But I would like to explain to those who would like to know why I decided to follow Islam.

YOU CAN’T TAKE IT WITH YOU WHEN YOU’RE GONE…

Although I went to a Roman Catholic school and church as a child, I have always been naturally inclined to question the nature of God. Many people have secular natures and feel that religion and philosophy is largely unimportant in their lives. I think that a large contributor to this is the amount of contradictions within Christianity. There are so many churches, denominations, so many versions of the Bibles, Jesus is God, no he’s the Son of God, no, he’s both. Aaargh. How do we sift out the truth from the jumble? Many people make a conscious choice that none of it is important and decide to try and live life ethically as far as possible. The problem with this choice is that human beings are not perfect. We constantly push the boundaries of what is acceptable; we always try to “justify” something we know is unethical or wrong because we want to do it so badly. Our desires are always at war with our conscience, and it’s all too often the desires that win out.

Man-made laws are always changing because of this very reason. We all think we know better, but the truth is that we are all flawed and have a myopic view of the world. We can’t always see the bigger picture and we want everything to be perfect for ourselves. In reality, we do not live in a perfect world. If someone asked me why we are here on this world, I would reply that we are here to learn. And just as in any school or university, we are going to be tested from time to time. Hopefully, we will come through those tests as better people. Life is temporary. Whether you believe in an afterlife or not, you’re still going to die and leave this place with nothing but a legacy (whether it’s good or bad is up to you).  There will always be suffering and there will always be hardships. Sometimes we have to make sacrifices for the good of others and at other times we have to be courageous and try to change things for the better. In light of this, going through life with the goals of getting the latest iPod or driving a Mercedes seems wimpy.

I accept that we all have different opinions – this is what makes us human. However, most of us are plainly arrogant and blinded by worldly comforts to realise our own mortality. In a world of six billion souls, how do we carry on being so greedy when there is not enough to go around?

THE JOURNEY

My father was completing a degree in Philosophy of Religion when I was attending my Catholic primary school. On one occasion, after attending a school church mass, I remember my father telling me to question my beliefs and apply logic to them. If people expect me to believe in something, he said, I should question that article of faith. If it seems illogical, I should continue to question until a logical solution presents itself. “There’s no logic to suggest that Jesus is the Son of God, for instance” I remember him saying.

I took the advice. I refused to perform my First Holy Communion because the teachers could not seem to even vaguely explain why one had to do it. Each time I read the Bible, I kept questioning and comparing it with other parts of the Bible. By the time I was ten, I knew for sure I wanted nothing to do with the Roman Catholic Church. I searched for anyone who could explain the Christian faith satisfactorily and logically as a whole. When I did Religious Studies for my “O” Levels, I had realized the following:

·         Jesus never said he was the Son Of God, or for that matter God Himself. He always referred to himself as the Son of Man.

·         Jesus was a Jew and never sought to establish a new faith that would reject the teachings of the previous Prophets. He observed the Shabat, Pesach and other Jewish holy days, but spoke out against the overzealous and complicated interpretations of the Law as practiced by the Pharisees and the greedy and corrupt practices of the Sadducees. Jesus never ate a morsel of food that was not kosher and conducted himself with humility, restraint and compassion at all times.

·         The four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John were written by men who had never actually met Jesus –  written as much as 100 years after his death – and who all seemed to use anecdotal material from an unknown source named by scholars as “Q”. Aside from the common thread, many additional and often contradictory accounts of Jesus’ life seem to have been passed on by oral tradition and in many instances changed to suit the scribe’s whims as the gospels were translated from (possibly) Aramaic to New Testament Greek to Latin.

·         Paul of Tarsus was a Gentile with no background or true understanding of Judaism or monotheism. It has been argued by many critics that he saw an opportunity to be the architect of a new religion and changed whatever wouldn’t “fit” with the idol-worshipping Gentiles. Barnabas, the disciple and scribe of Jesus had such intense arguments with Paul over his interpretation of Jesus’ teachings and methods that the two eventually parted company. Paul went on to persuade his followers that the Law of Moses was unimportant. He built the foundation for the establishment of the early Church and wooed leaders of state to adopt what then became known as Christianity.

Having learnt all this, I became further disillusioned with Christianity as an institution and armed with the knowledge that Jesus was simply a messenger of God, I could not find any Christian denomination I was satisfied with.

In high school there were several Muslim children in my class whom I became friends with. These children and the families they came from were under no circumstances considered to be particularly pious within their communities, but I saw in them something that most other children didn’t have – belief in their religion. They would not touch haraam (unclean) foods, they went to mosque on Fridays and they were comfortable in their beliefs, as though Islam had grown up alongside them as a friend. Intrigued, I asked one of my friends to give me a copy of the Quran. She brought one for me covered in cloth with strict instructions not to touch it while in a state of uncleanliness (e.g. menstruation) out of respect for the book. This piqued my curiosity even further, as no such rules exist where handling the Bible is concerned.

The moment I opened the Quran life began to make sense to me. The verses flowed in a cascading torrent from my eyes to my heart, tumbling into little logically-shaped slots in my brain. Tears streamed down my face as question after question was answered for me.

BECOMING A MUSLIM

I knew from that moment on that I wanted to become a Muslim, but the road to that end proved to be a long and arduous one. I was too shy to tell any of my Muslim friends and I didn’t have access to a mosque or Muslim organization. My mother found out I was trying to fast during ramadaan and threatened me with unspeakable things if I didn’t cut it out. I was too young to make a life-changing decision of this nature and told myself that when the time was right, I would know. Four years later, married to a non-Muslim, I made the decision to embrace Islam as my way of life. I decided this the week of the World Trade Centre attacks in 2001. Before anyone leaps to any conclusions from a standing start, I must say that although 9/11 spurred me into a decision, it does not necessarily follow that I support the idea of people getting into planes and crashing them into buildings. I realised that the Muslim world would be painted with a heavy-handed brush and I couldn’t stand on the sidelines without declaring my beliefs.

I’m just as flawed as the next person, but I try to show others that Muslims are not a bunch of fanatics. I won’t get into the jihad issue in depth, but the meaning of the word “jihad” is literally “struggle” or “strife” and it means that wherever a Muslim is being oppressed, a neighbor should always strive to assist. It doesn’t mean he should chop the head off the offending person, it means that he should use whatever means at his disposal to assist. The political and religious leaders (who are often poorly educated) have given jihad a bad name for the sake of their own ulterior motives. A legitimate form of jihad in terms of politics or statehood is to declare war on the offending nation, but it has been expressly forbidden in Islam to harm civilians (most hated is the harming of innocent women or children) or even uproot trees during the battle.

When it is stated that every Muslim should engage in jihad, it means that we should struggle and make some sacrifices to help the less fortunate among us. For example, we should do whatever we can to assist those long-suffering civilians in Gaza – they have no power, no medicines, no way of getting out. They live in a massive concentration camp, when any day could be their last and we live lives of luxury with luxury cars, well-paying jobs and freedom of movement. Even if all I can do is raise awareness of this suffering, I must bear with those who point at me and say I am a threat to the “free world”. And I’m not an anti-Semitist by the way. “The God of my forefathers is the God of your forefathers” – we worship the same God and share the same Prophets. I respect Jewish people for retaining their belief in One God and not bringing others in as objects of worship. I have a problem with people of any religion killing, harming or oppressing innocent civilians, and this includes both the Israeli government and Palestinian fighters.

THE PROPHETS

The most important tenet of faith in Islam is that of tawheed, or Oneness of God. La illaha ilallah means literally, “no god but God” and this statement is repeated every day before sleeping. Muslims revere all the prophets revered by the Jews (and by inference, Christians). Adam, Abraham, Jonas, David, Solomon, Joseph, Moses, John the Baptist and Jesus are all messengers of God and given the same status and respect as the Prophet Muhammad. They are all regarded as very special men, free from greater sins and given messages from God for a particular people at a specific time. All of them preached the Oneness of God. So it is hardly conceivable to me that Jews and Muslims should look upon one another with mistrust and hatred when in fact we have so much in common.

THE ISLAMIC WAY OF LIFE

It took some time to fully realise the impact that embracing Islam would have on my life. As I was already married to a non-Muslim, things became a wee bit tense when I threw all the alcohol and pork products out of the house. A Muslim is supposed to pray five times a day. This is not just normal prayer where you throw out your hands and say any old thing that’s on your mind (we do that too). This is formal prayer, and you have to pray on a prayer mat in Arabic.

Learning the Arabic – not so easy. Persuading yourself to get up for the pre-dawn prayer – even more difficult. Seeing the look on your born-again in-laws’ faces when they see you walking past in a big black boorka – priceless!

Not ever drinking alcohol again was no big loss to me. Not ever eating bacon again, now that was more of a sacrifice. You also have to get used to wearing clothes that cover your entire body and a scarf to cover the head. It’s a big adjustment.

Then there’s the issue of tahara (cleanliness). You cannot offer formal prayers without ceremonial cleanliness. Any of the following actions render you in a greater state of impurity:

·         Having sexual intercourse

·         Menstruation

·         Discharge of semen accompanied by sexual lust

·         Bleeding and discharge after giving birth

This state of greater impurity can only be cleansed by taking a ritual bath (ghusl) during which you wet your entire body and the hair on the head.

Lesser impurity is caused by:

·         Urinating or passing stools

·         Passing wind

·         Blood flowing from any part of the body

·         Vomiting

·         Sleeping

·         Unconciousness

Attaining tahara after any of these things necessitates washing the hands, mouth, nostrils, arms and feet in a ritual called wudhu. After passing urine or stools, a Muslim must always wash his/her private parts with water immediately by pouring water from a jug and washing the private parts with the left hand. Failure to do this would render a person into a state of greater impurity and a ghusl bath would then be necessary.

The armpits and the groin must be clean-shaven each week, for males and females, for hygiene reasons. This can also be hard to adjust to, especially for men.

All these things are very difficult to get used to if you have not grown up doing them, but the difference it makes to your life is immense. The rewards from these simple (and some would say pointless) acts are innumerable. Apart from a greatly improved state of general cleanliness, it brings about an almost constant level of God-consciousness in the person. We learn to distance ourselves from our bodily desires and needs and remind ourselves at all times of God’s commands. We also learn a greater respect and fear for our Creator, as we bear in mind that we cannot offer worship to him without cleanliness, purity and modesty. A Muslim who offers prayer regularly cannot help but think of God, and this is why many of the more pious among us often seem sober and unapproachable to Westerners.

OUR WAY OF LIFE IS NOT BARBARIC!

Many people would say that Islam is a “backward” religion and it promotes the oppression of women. I do agree that in many countries where Islam is the main religion, women are treated appallingly, with arranged marriages, honour killings and female circumcision so commonplace it doesn’t even raise eyebrows. However, this is as a result of cultural practices and not Islamic beliefs. For instance, arranged marriages are permitted, but only if the girl gives her consent, enabling the parents who are older and wiser than her to give guidance as to whom she marries. In the days before the advent of Islam, the practice of burying daughters alive was commonplace until it was strictly forbidden by the Prophet Muhammad. Honour killings also have no place in the Muslim faith. All of these terrible and unjust travesties reflect on the culture of the people from whence they originated and the fact that those people cling to these mores despite having the enlightened values of Islam at their fingertips. Many so-called “muslim” countries are governed by mysognistic and barbaric men who twist Islam to keep women in their “place”.

Western culture should not be regarded as the only option for people on Earth. Each society, religion and culture has their own unique way of life and although the Earth is a crowded and troubled place, we need to recognise that everyone has a right to their own identity. I don’t try to convert anyone to Islam. If one person can see Islam in a slightly more positive light than they previously did, then I am doing my bit for world peace.

---

Possibly related posts: (automatically generated)

• FAQ
• Some nice hardware
• Allergic
• Hoax Anti-Obama E-mails Still Fool Dumb White Guys